


You taste like all the sunsets I can't remember

by Pepper_m3at



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Crying soulmates, Fluff and Angst, HyungHyuk - Freeform, M/M, Men Crying, MinWon - Freeform, One Shot, Soulmate AU, Temporary Amnesia, alternative universe, and I'm also gay and sad, i love the boys, it's just so gay and sad, monsta x - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-11
Updated: 2019-12-11
Packaged: 2021-02-26 07:40:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,227
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21759970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pepper_m3at/pseuds/Pepper_m3at
Summary: “What’s your name? It’s okay, don’t… Don’t cry. Maybe you had mistaken me for somebody?”
Relationships: Chae Hyungwon/Lee Minhyuk
Kudos: 46





	You taste like all the sunsets I can't remember

**Author's Note:**

> sad and anxious but still publishing it because i'm proud of it

Life was never fair, but this time made Minhyuk reconsider if choosing it over miserable death was "the good option". Considering the amount of money and good will that was put into bringing him back to the state of decent usefulness, he should've been the happiest man alive. And yet, this night felt as if the world just turned its back on him, and made him so powerless, so weak. So  _ useless.  _ When did his life become so meaningless? He was trying to remember at least a tiny bit of the past, but it only made his head hurt more.  _ No, I shouldn't even think about it. I got a new chance to start a totally new life, I won't just ruin it like that. _ The fact, that his brain tried to push away the thoughts of recently tasted rejection and disappointment, was uplifting, though. Whoever Lee Minhyuk had been before, he became a mere shadow of his past self. A sad caricature of - what once was a bright and colorful person, who was always eager to help others with their struggles.  _ And now I've become one myself.  _ Leaning on the edge of the rooftop, he felt like his heart travels all the way up his throat. Was he suicidal? No…  _ It takes balls to kill yourself, balls which I clearly don’t have.  _ He sat down and wiped his eyes with a sleeve.  _ Who am I? _

The night was still young - although the sky was paved with stars, blinking to him in a language that no human was capable of understanding, he knew that it was not that late. Tilting his head back, he could hear the noise of evening traffic, sound of engines trying to outshout each other, the beautiful cacophony of voices coming from every direction. Wind played with his black, ruffled hair, just as it did with the twigs of the trees in the nearby park. _ I’m lost, and I don’t really know if I want to be found now. It’s worryingly comfortable in here. Nobody would notice if I just fell asleep here and…  _ Sudden opening of the door overlooking at the rooftop almost made him jump.

He turned his head, just to see a tall figure, staring at him with those big, dark eyes from behind his nice, ashy brown fringe.  _ He’s here too.  _ Minhyuk blinked a few times, so did the other man, looking at him more confused, than angry, or disappointed.  _ For whatever reason.  _ He could see the tears in the other man’s eyes, wet tracks on his face and his trembling, beautifully shaped lips.  _ He’s broken. What happened?  _ The timing seemed rather weird, especially that… 

“What happened?” Minhyuk asked, instead of doubting, as he got up and reposed his shirt. It was cool outside, but he felt it only in that moment - when he saw those tears on that beautiful face. That oddly familiar face…  _ Who are you? Apart from working here...  _ The other man didn’t answer, squeezing the skirts of his black t-shirt, staring at Minhyuk ominously. “Hello? Do you need any help…” black haired man got up and gave the other man soft gaze, keeping the safe distance between them.  _ What if he’s aggressive?  _ His head felt like bursting from all these thoughts.  _ He wouldn’t be crying then… But what if he’s desperate..?  _ Minhyuk opened his eyes wider, when the other man fell on his knees and hid his face in his hands.

“You don’t remember me, do you?” his sweet, cold, mahony voice made Minhyuk shiver. Or maybe it was just the wind? He knelt in front of the other man, who was trembling in the hysterical convulsions, as he was sobbing loudly. “Minhyuk, I know you don’t, but please, don’t say it. I don’t want to hear these words, they are…” he had to take a break, before he burst out with his whimpering again, as he raised his head, just for his and Minhyuk’s eyes to meet.  _ You can’t just remember nothing. You can’t forget me like this.  _

Minhyuk slightly parted his lips, something stabbing the back of his consciousness. This tall, slim figure of a man just begging him not to say the obvious truth. That he just  _ doesn’t remember him.  _ Maybe they knew each other before? There was something in that maroon eyed man that set a small flame of familiarity in his heart. That made his soul shudder inside of his body. Maybe they were friends? It seems so. But why would the other man be so dramatic over it? Minhyuk was confused, but more than this, he was deeply touched. 

“How did you find me there? I-I won’t call the security, don’t worry, I am just curious.” Minhyuk wiped his own, almost dried already, eyes and cheeks and sniffed with a soft, genuine smile. “What’s your name? It’s okay, don’t… Don’t cry. Maybe you had mistaken me for somebody?” he asked calmly.

The taller man put his hands down, trying to calm down - and Minhyuk’s voice definitely helped him. That light, husky tone, that he used to hear when he was falling asleep, that greeted him in the morning. Melodic, full of genuine compassion.  _ At least your voice and your personality are still the same…  _ His lips were trembling, when he started to explain - although he felt like this would only confuse the other man more:

“I’m… My name is Hyungwon, remember?” he asked softly, gazing into the other man’s eyes, with his heart skipping a beat. After all these years Minhyuk was still beautiful like all of the sunsets he used to cherish every time they happen to go for a walk in the evening. “I… You may think I’m crazy but when you started crying I… I started crying too. And I know that it sounds unbelievable but… The closer I was to you, the more tears… Minhyuk…” he whined again and grabbed the other man’s hands. Black haired one raised his eyebrows, but there was no reason not to believe… Hyungwon.

This name struck a lightning inside of his heart, but his head was still filled with that nameless void.  _ Hyungwon…  _ He whispered under his breath. It was leaving a sweat-sour taste in his mouth and sliding down his spine, covering his skin with goosebumps.  _ Hyungwon…  _ Like the sound of bells in the nearby church, or the sweetest chirp of a nightingale. A name that brought so much excitement and joy, but at the same time it contradicted with his beautiful face, drowned in sorrow.  _ Hyungwon… _

“Chae Hyungwon.” Minhyuk almost didn’t feel his lips moving, when he said this word. It was almost as if he wasn’t the one who said it. He noticed a spark of that wild, untamed happiness in the other man’s eyes.  _ How do I even know this?  _

“Y-yes, that’s me. I am Chae Hyungwon.” brown haired man said, as he softly caressed Minhyuk’s icy hands, while staring into his eyes. He felt his heart skipping a beat again.  _ So there was hope - and this hope was telling him not to stop.  _ Minhyuk found out that he doesn’t want the other man to stop doing this. His touch was so soothing, so.. oddly familiar… “Minhyuk, after… I didn’t…” he couldn’t say anything, as his throat was clutching from all of the emotions. “I thought that you were abroad, after all of the things that happened but you were here all along.” he sobbed happily, lowering his head and shaking, as tears streamed down his face. “After…”

“My accident.” Minhyuk blinked a few times, crooking his head. Billions of visions just ran through his brain, in the moment when Hyungwon held his hands for the first time. He saw himself getting hit by a car from a distance, he witnessed every kiss, every little and big word that was whispered to his ear. Every touch - these subtle, and these not-so-subtle. He gasped loudly, seeing himself getting roughed up by a car, rolling on the road, his head hitting the pavement. Slowly, he raised his hand, just to touch the small bump, located slightly above his ear. The exact place, where he hit himself. He looked into Hyungwon’s eyes. He still felt was a stranger, but at least now Minhyuk knew, why he felt so much like home.  _ These are all his memories, right? And I’m in them… We weren’t only friends. We were… _

“One.” they said in unison, then raising their eyes at each other. There were so many things that Minhyuk couldn’t wrap his head around at that moment. All of that information hit him in one moment, he definitely wasn’t ready for that. It wasn’t the feeling of remembering something - it felt more like somebody just showed him a movie. He didn’t feel certain connection to those memories - but he was connected to something else.  _ Someone  _ else.

“Hyungwon…” he opened his mouth in slight terror, then covered it with his hand. This is why his mind was never at peace. This is why he couldn’t have anybody else, why there was always someone on his mind, that he imagined every time when he had sex with somebody, even though he couldn’t remember the face. Why he was waking up in the middle of the night squeezing the duvet with that sweet-sour taste on his tongue… When he cried for no reason at all. It was Hyungwon the whole time.

With his breath fast, he shook his head and threw his arms around the taller man’s neck. Delirious, but frightened at the same time. Even more memories hit him now, the sweet ones and the sad ones. Hyungwon’s touch was almost ethereal, as he gave the hug back, cuddling Minhyuk into his slim, delicate chest. His lips were trembling, and his fingers clutching on the other man’s shirt, wanting to pull him closer, and closer. He kissed the crown of the black haired man’s head, while whispering quietly:

“I finally found you, Minhyukkie, I am here… You don’t have to be afraid anymore… I am here… Oh my god…” he sobbed, when Minhyuk started crying too, his hot tears wetting Hyungwon’s tee. He felt weird mixture of happiness and distress at the same time, when his big hands searched their place on the other man’s back. He brushed through Hyungwon’s nape, his heart pounding furiously against his rib cage.  _ He found me. Hyungwon… _

“I don’t know what happened, and why we… Why nobody told me about you and all of this, I… Why did it happen? I was told that I survived the plane crash landing b-but… It was a car..? A car hit me? Hyungwon, what… Don’t leave me now!” he cried into the other man’s arm, as he softly caressed Minhyuk’s smooth, dense black hair. “I’m scared, and I’m alone, please… P-please don’t leave me. I need to understand… I need time but…” he said, sniffing.  _ He smells so beautifully, just like the peonies…  _

Minhyuk looked up, just to see that gorgeous face in front of him. To meet that astral gaze, focused only on him, to feel those plump, thoughtfully carved lips on his own. And he had no reason not to give that longing kiss back. And it tasted just like his name. Sweet and sour… He quickly realised that this was what he was lacking of for all this time. His hands wandered up to Hyungwon’s hair, tangling into it and pulling him closer, as they starting to crave more and more. But Hyungwon stopped, his breath stepped and quick, flowing on Minhyuk’s cold, pale skin.

“I love you, Minhyuk. You may not remember it… B-but I’ve never stopped loving you, since the day I saw you for the last time, till now.” he whimpered into his ear, his chest going up and down. “I don’t want to use you in anyway I just… I am so happy to finally see you. To touch you again to… Feel your eyes and hands on me. I missed you so much, oh god…”

Minhyuk tried to calm down, as the adrenaline rush hammered his head, while he was staring at the beautiful countenance of his… His.. His Hyungwon. Because at that point, he deeply believed and trusted, that this was the person who he lacked of the most for the last two years of his life.

“Wonnie…” the black haired man started, pressing his lips to Hyungwon’s temple, so he could feel that soothing warmth and identify them with the proximity of their bodies tightly tied together. “I… Believe that I loved you... “ he said quietly, as he delicately caressed his nape and back with his big palms, his finger mapping the other man’s body. “So please… Show me how it is to fall in love with you again.” he said and tucked Hyungwon’s lower lip between his own two, leaning into the brown haired man’s embrace with his whole body. He was trembling - the night was cold. But Hyungwon had that weird spark. The warmth of thousand sunsets Minhyuk missed so much but was told to avoid.  _ He tastes like a sunset, a summer sunset. His eyes look like sun’s reflection in the river and his olive skin makes me think of the purest and most soothing caress.  _ Hyungwon gave the kiss back and smiled delicately, through his tears.

_ Don’t forget me anymore. I’ll be missing you like oxygen. _


End file.
